It seems like I’m in a complaining mood today. Because that’s what I am about to do again. Just after few days of telling to my seniors at work that I don’t do those girly blog. *Sigh!
Anyway, do you ever feel like ripping someone’s head off even if they did no harm to you than coming in your way to your happiness unknowingly? Well I have been feeling that a lot lately. Not just one person but whole bunch of them. I want to grill them each and then probably sell their meat to some cafe and watch people enjoy them. ( Blame this one to DEXTER). I want to torture them each as I’ve been tortured today, feeling guilty and angry of not taking that step. I simply hate that feeling, you know.
I mean I know that I always say heroes are sexy with remorse. But I am no hero. I don’t have any powers. I am an ordinary to abnormal level girl who loves throwing tantrum like a spoil brat (yuss, I just threw tantrums – again-to a friend few minutes ago) and have things her way. Maybe I have a bit OCD and BPD and others too, but come on, every one of us is insane inside. I only have lots of them in me and I love bringing them out. (Good for my dream of being a writer, I think)
Anyway, besides them, if I dig deep inside right now to search for what I am feeling is calmness. Strangely. Maybe it has to do something with this little girl I am talking to as I am jotting all my feelings down. She tells me to write it all down like I always do. Pen a story with anger and fear, end it up with love. How I miss writing them, these stories. Also, she tells me it’s going to be alright and calms me down as I tell her about my hidden plan of destroying something (blame it on DEXTER again) and my dreams of travelling and writing, just like her brother.